i have never lived my life so scared of what's gonna happen in the future..i kno i need 2 trust God with it all..but this whole dwindling economy thing is really starting 2 hit me..i never thought that some high up financial problem with the gas supply would ever.ever.everrrr affect me..but it has.& it sux..Everyday i wonder how much longer this is going 2 last..if it will just keep getting worse.& of course, i've got those thoughts that maybe, just maybe, this is signifying God's return..bcuz it just seems like evrythng is goin wrong..not just w/ the economy, but my life also..i think i should be learning to rely on God & only God thru all of this..2 realize that money gets u nowhere..& in the end, there's only God..but i'm still human..& i've come 2 depend on a decent supply of money.& now it's a shocker, 2 actually have 2 live w/o the things i've become so used 2..but that's the problem right there..i've made the material things so important..my selfish thoughts have consumed me..all i can think about is that i'll miss out on the joys of growing up..of getting married, having kids & a career..but i should be more concerned about reaching the lost..the ones that don't kno where they're goin when this material-based world is gone..bcuz when my imperfect self gets 2 heaven, marriage, a career & all those 'things' just won't matter..so this is random, & 4give me 4 not working it in2 this blog bettr..but i still can't fathom why we would have ever based our main mode of transportation on gas..why???? who in their right mind bases something soooo important on something so limited?! ah.sorry.this was so random.

I can't wait to go to heaven.like seriously..i can't even imagine a life w/ no time.no worries.no tears of sadness.no fears.nothing! just constant praising of our Lord & Savior.how freakin awesome! life here seems (& is) so petty when i think about heaven.my life has been so confusing lately.i have never felt so many different emotions in my life..ive cried.laughed.screamed more in the past few months than i have in the past 17 years. that song by theFray called 'all at once' ..ah! i luv it..bcuz it's so true..'there are certain ppl u just keep coming back to....sometimes the hardest thing & the rite thing are the same'..I kno what God is asking of me..& 2 me, it seems so impossible.to give up & move on from something that's been so close 2 me 4 so long.I have prayed that my life will bring Him glory..& that I would do evrythng & anythng 4 His glory..All 4 His glory..& he definitely heard that prayer..ha.I have learned & am still learning so much from all this..it's taught me to look at things so much differently.to really pay attention to detail.to even the smallest things.to make decisions.to listen & discern for his voice.to have patience..so many times I have found that i'm just yearning & desperate to hear God's voice..when really He's screaming @ the top of His lungs & I'm pushing it out of my head.I kno what He's asking of me.& it's just not what I want to hear..but I kno that after it's done..I will see just how necessary it was.because I kno God has bigger & better plans than my crazy imagination could ever think up!..sometimes I wish i could just take back ever saying 'all for your glory, God'..but I never will..bcuz even tho I've become attached..I need to be more attached to God & his will...'In his heart a man plans his course but the Lord determines his steps. -Proverbs 16:9'

so i know that im not the only one that struggles w/ patience. it's sooo hard to have. but i kno that i need it. in galatians, it's said that patience is a fruit of the spirit.it's a necessity.but who ever said that the necessities were easy to attain? god bless.
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Gal 5:22-26
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. 25 Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.
NIV

I believe that my faith can move mountains. Only through my deep-rooted faith in Christ, can I live my life for Him. Faith is not just a belief that something will happen. Faith is a trust in and reliance on God. A belief that He knows best and what happens is meant to be.


My faith in Christ has helped me through many of life's ups and downs. When there is drama at school or a life changing decision to make, I can know that my faith in God will help me to endure it all. I believe Christ can help me through anything and everything. In every circumstance, I know he will be there to walk me through it.


Contrary to popular belief, doing good deeds is not a saving grace. Living a life that imitates that of Christ serves as my assurance for eternal life. Although my faith does not make my life completely without hardships, it gives me sustenance. I have something and someone to lean one when life gets difficult. The trials and tribulations I undergo are all a part of the plan for my life. Each circumstance teaches me something about life. Each one gives me an idea of what to do when I am caught in another hard decision. And above all, each circumstance gives me wisdom; wisdom to walk this daily life.


I do not know where I would be without my faith in Christ. I truly believe I would be lost without him. Each day, he is there to uphold and strengthen me. My faith does not make me perfect in any way. It is the foundation in which my belief is built on. Most people would agree with the idea that a strong foundation is the basis of an unshakable belief. Faith is believing without seeing. It is the very epitome of what happens when we walk into a situation and have no idea what will happen. It could be the best or worst outcome. I believe faith is almost like the wind; you can't see it, but it's the center of everything. Therefore, I walk by faith even when I can not see what lies before me.

evryday we live..we live it like we have a million more days 2 go.but we don't kno that.so many of us ((myself included)) take each day 4 granted.& it's so sad that it takes deaths for ppl 2 realize our time here isn't gonna last forever.that sometimes we dont kno when we will leave our lasting impression. it seems so surreal.like it couldnt have really happened.how could someone that you just talked 2 b gone from this earth forever.it's so unfathomable.yet it happens.evryone always is so quick to say the usual stuff after a death. ooo don't worry they went 2 a better place. how do u kno? it kills me when i kno that i had the chance to tell them the secret that would save them. & i didnt. & once they're gone, uve lost ur chance. there's no goin back. it's so hard 2 live knowing that u can't rewind. u can't take back what u said & did.